Worth it

While I was pregnant, the comments and questions that I would encounter from people on a daily basis became quite predictable. So predictable that I toyed with the idea of making a sign to put up at work that would cover everything in the conversation that I knew would ensue:

Yes, I have a big pregnant belly. I'm __ weeks. Due January 31. Yes, first one. Boy. Samuel. 

It became a familiar script that I would repeat at least 15 times a day. Now I've started to notice a pattern with what people say when they see Samuel, except most of them I don't mind. These are the top four things people remark about day to day :)

1.)    His eyes. Almost without fail, this is the first thing people comment on. This is also the most common—okay, okay ONLY—feature that people say looks like me. My eyes are definitely not that blue so maybe they mean the shape? Or maybe everyone just feels bad that my son doesn’t resemble me so they’re throwing me a bone ;)

2.)    His height. Samuel is in the 96% for height. He is one tall baby! People always think he’s older than he is. We make an odd pair since I’m so short, and if someone comments on his height, their next comment usually is: “He must have a tall dad.”

3.)    His mouth. Random strangers are always exclaiming what a big smile he has and what full lips he has (that sounded like Little Red Riding Hood in my head), but anyone that knows Michael knows just where Samuel got his infectious smile and full lips.

4.)    His head. This one drives me insane and I try my best not to go snappy-mama-bear on them. Samuel’s head shape is a lot shorter than when he was first born, but it’s still pretty long. He had a hard time getting up over my pelvic bone during delivery and there was a lot of back and forth as I pushed for an hour and 20 minutes.  Tough journey for the little guy. 

A few weeks ago, Samuel got sick for the first time. It started out as a low-grade fever, refusal to eat, lethargy, sore throat and then he started getting red bumps on his hands, arms, feet and legs. Some of the spots turned into blisters. I brought him into the doctor and he said Samuel had hand-foot-and-mouth. It's viral so there's no antibiotics and we just had to wait it out. It's also highly contagious but the doctor assured me that it's extremely rare for adults to get. Well, tell that to the mama who caught it. Seriously, PSA: If your children are sick, keep them away from others! Samuel and I both got cabin fever staying home for two weeks while we waited until we weren't contagious but we did it because I do not want anyone to have to go through that!

In other news, we found out Samuel does NOT like fireworks. Michael worked his company's firework show in Idaho Falls on Independence Day so we had our own little fireworks after. We first showed Samuel the sparklers and he really couldn't care less. He would glance and then just look at other things outside. He was far more interested in looking at the person holding the sparkler than looking at the sparkler itself. Then we lit a small fountain and once it started popping Samuel startled and immediately had a meltdown.  

We love our little firecracker! I didn't realize Samuel was high maintenance at first because he's the only baby I've ever had and I just assumed his temperament was normal. It wasn't until we started socializing him with babies his age that I started to notice a difference. At first I was just thinking "Man, their baby is so chill; he just falls asleep anywhere as soon as he gets tired." Then we hang out with another baby and I think, "Man, their baby is mellow; she is totally content just sitting there and staring off into space." Time after time it was the same story: Their baby is calm, their baby is calm, their baby is calm too. Eventually I had a "wait a minute..." moment and realized that it wasn't everyone else's babies that were mellow, it was Samuel that wasn't. He just is high maintenance--like me as my brother, Paul, jokes. 

Often if he's in a fussy mood people will try to offer advice on what's wrong although really they have no idea. It can be really frustrating because really people just don't understand. And how could they? If they have an easy baby--or easy children-- then it's hard to understand a baby that is in need of constant change and interaction, a baby that is fussy because he's tired but always battles hard going to sleep. A lot of the time he is quite happy and you can get him to smile and laugh at the drop of a hat. All babies get fussy sometimes, he just needs more catering than most. Really it just depends on the day. Or the hour ;)

We do have some friends whose daughter is just a few weeks older than Samuel and her temperament is very much like his. It is so nice to talk with them because they genuinely understand and that is such a great feeling!! I know I bring some of the work upon myself because of my choice in parenting style since I personally am not a cry-it-out mom. I'm fully aware, especially with Samuel's temperament, that it would make my life so much easier if I were a cry-it-out mom and would just stick my son in the back room and close the door while he cried and cried. But I'm not, especially when they're younger than a year.

There is a quote by Lyle J. Burrup that I often think of as my arms ache and I'm emotionally drained from soothing an unhappy baby for hours on end: "Anything of great worth often requires great sacrifice." And oh how he is worth it!!

 

Samuel Leonardo: Birth and first month

Disclaimer: In case you missed the title, this blog talks about Samuel's birth. If you don't want to read about childbirth, I'm sure there are plenty of funny memes on your news feed to keep you entertained. Otherwise, read on ;)

At my 36 week ultrasound, Samuel measured 5 lbs 13 ounces (49%) and so my doctor didn't see any medical need to induce early. However, since I had gestational diabetes he didn't want me to go too far past my due date. So my due date was Friday Jan. 31 and my induction was scheduled for the day after, Sat. Feb. 1. Something I learned quickly is that once you become pregnant, people suddenly think it's a green light to offer their personal opinion on every choice you have to make(and I've discovered now that Samuel's born, it's even more so.) That being said, some people are against induction but I have no problem with it; I think modern medicine is amazing and without it my life wouldn't be the same. Along with that, I have had several key experiences that caused me to have a lot of trust in my doctor and if he didn't think I should go very far past my due date, then by golly, I agree ;)  (The irony is that it didn't really matter anyway)

So the night before the induction, I was so nervous/excited I could hardly sleep. Imagine a little kid trying to go to sleep on Christmas Eve. Now multiply that by about 1 million. I couldn't wait to meet my baby boy!!!! I was supposed to call the hospital at 5am for confirmation. I called and the nurse told me to call back at 10:00. So I did and she told me that four other women had come into the hospital in spontaneous labor and I would have to call back at 1:00 to see if they could fit me in. At 1:00 I called back and they said the labors were still ongoing and they rescheduled my induction for Tuesday Feb. 4th. I thanked the nurse, hung up and bawled. And bawled. I was so excited to meet my son and now I had to wait three more days. Was I over reacting? Of course, but try telling that to a 40 week pregnant woman with crazy hormones. To make it worse, when I stopped by the grocery store later that day I ran into someone I knew and they said "You STILL haven't had your baby??" Towards the end of my pregnancy my sister-in-law asked if I felt like I wanted to punch everyone and I've got to admit that day in the grocery store it took some restraint ;)

So that night I'm laying in bed trying to fall asleep and without a warning, my water breaks at 11:30pm. I call Michael's name and he must've known what was up because he came dashing in from the other room. I was oddly calm as we got ready to go since I'd had our hospital bags back for over a month. Michael was scurrying around in a frenzy even though there was nothing to do but get in the car. It was a pretty comical soon-to-be-dad moment. And on the drive to the hospital we're cracking jokes that the nurses would think we were faking it like "Emily Johnson? Aren't you the girl who called in three times today?" So on the day I was supposed to be induced, Samuel decided to start making his way into the world. I guess he didn't like taking no for an answer ;)

I gave birth to Samuel without an epidural, so you can imagine the fun times we had that night ;) I know you're thinking "Wait, wait, I thought you were all for modern medicine?" And I am. I think it's amazing and going in to the hospital, I wasn't entirely sure I was going to have a natural birth. I told the nurses that's what I wanted but I would let them know if I changed my mind. Growing up, my mom was always telling us how bad epidurals were(she gave birth to eight children. Amazing!) but really my decision had nothing to do with what she or anyone else wanted. It was solely my choice and maybe with my other labors I will have an epidural, who knows. Do you want to know what really pushed me to decide to go natural? It's pretty funny: I was watching What to Expect When You're Expecting and I cried when the character without an epidural gave birth to her daughter. Yes, crazy pregnancy hormones strike again. But it was then that I thought that I wanted to experience the pure joy and relief at the end of a painful labor and hold the baby that I had worked so hard to bring into this world. Silliest reason ever? Probably, but there it is.

So, during labor, I had Michael write down what was happening and at what time, because I sure wouldn't be able to remember all this information otherwise!At my 38 week appointment I was 2 cm dilated and 75% effaced. When I went into the hospital I was 4 cm and 100% effaced. They hooked me up to a monitor and my contractions were about 2-3 minutes apart but relatively no pain. In fact, I had been periodically experiencing the same sensation for a few weeks but never even recognized them as contractions. The next three hours passed and Michael and I watched a Jim Gaffigan stand-up comedy DVD that we had borrowed from a friend. Towards the end, my lower back started to ache and I just assumed my body was uncomfortable sitting in the same position so when the nurse came back in I asked if I could be unhooked and walk around for a while. By 3:00am I was having normal contraction pain and continual increasing pain in my lower back. I asked the nurse about it and she said it sounded like I was having a lot of back labor and it was unfortunate because it was one of the most uncomfortable ways to labor. Lucky me.

By 5:00am I was having painful contractions and as I was leaning over throwing up into the toilet, I thought of Mary--the mother of Jesus--and how I could now truly understand how sad it was that no one would let her in while she was in labor and riding on a donkey. Random thought, I know.

At 5:20am I was 8 cm dilated. Then I labored for an hour with painful contractions. Checked again at 6:20? Still 8 cm. Let me tell you, that has to be the most discouraging thing. I was thinking, "Are you kidding me? All that pain with NO progress?" Soon after, my body started uncontrollably shaking. The nurse assured me it was normal but it's a weird feeling to not be in control of what you're body is doing. I threw up a few more times and by 7:15 I was 9 1/2 cm dilated. At this point, the contractions were, to put it gently, excruciating. I would squeeze Michael's hand through each one and he later told me that at one point his thumb was purple lol. I was pushing for a little over an hour and at one point, Samuel's heart rate was really low so they put me on oxygen. After 9 1/2 hours of labor, the sweet little guy was born at 8:53am. He weighed 7 lbs 13 ounces, 20 inches long. Of all days, he was born Feb. 2, which is always Groundhog Day and was also Superbowl Sunday. He is the Seahawks' lucky charm.

Whew, did you make it through that novel? :) Samuel is now 1 month old! We won't have his current height/weight measurements until his 2 month appointment. He likes being held constantly--especially with his head against your chest, hearing loud white noise(vacuum, blender, faucet), listening to music and is captivated by Dr. Seuss' artwork. He also likes his binky--Thank Goodness since we waited until he was a month to give it to him. He does NOT like being naked at all which includes getting dressed, diaper changes and baths. He also doesn't like having his nails trimmed but I quickly learned to do that while he's sleeping ;) He is already very vocal, can roll to his side if you put him on his back, holds up his neck for quite some time and is starting to show little smiles. We love our little Samuel Leonardo! <3