Worth it

While I was pregnant, the comments and questions that I would encounter from people on a daily basis became quite predictable. So predictable that I toyed with the idea of making a sign to put up at work that would cover everything in the conversation that I knew would ensue:

Yes, I have a big pregnant belly. I'm __ weeks. Due January 31. Yes, first one. Boy. Samuel. 

It became a familiar script that I would repeat at least 15 times a day. Now I've started to notice a pattern with what people say when they see Samuel, except most of them I don't mind. These are the top four things people remark about day to day :)

1.)    His eyes. Almost without fail, this is the first thing people comment on. This is also the most common—okay, okay ONLY—feature that people say looks like me. My eyes are definitely not that blue so maybe they mean the shape? Or maybe everyone just feels bad that my son doesn’t resemble me so they’re throwing me a bone ;)

2.)    His height. Samuel is in the 96% for height. He is one tall baby! People always think he’s older than he is. We make an odd pair since I’m so short, and if someone comments on his height, their next comment usually is: “He must have a tall dad.”

3.)    His mouth. Random strangers are always exclaiming what a big smile he has and what full lips he has (that sounded like Little Red Riding Hood in my head), but anyone that knows Michael knows just where Samuel got his infectious smile and full lips.

4.)    His head. This one drives me insane and I try my best not to go snappy-mama-bear on them. Samuel’s head shape is a lot shorter than when he was first born, but it’s still pretty long. He had a hard time getting up over my pelvic bone during delivery and there was a lot of back and forth as I pushed for an hour and 20 minutes.  Tough journey for the little guy. 

A few weeks ago, Samuel got sick for the first time. It started out as a low-grade fever, refusal to eat, lethargy, sore throat and then he started getting red bumps on his hands, arms, feet and legs. Some of the spots turned into blisters. I brought him into the doctor and he said Samuel had hand-foot-and-mouth. It's viral so there's no antibiotics and we just had to wait it out. It's also highly contagious but the doctor assured me that it's extremely rare for adults to get. Well, tell that to the mama who caught it. Seriously, PSA: If your children are sick, keep them away from others! Samuel and I both got cabin fever staying home for two weeks while we waited until we weren't contagious but we did it because I do not want anyone to have to go through that!

In other news, we found out Samuel does NOT like fireworks. Michael worked his company's firework show in Idaho Falls on Independence Day so we had our own little fireworks after. We first showed Samuel the sparklers and he really couldn't care less. He would glance and then just look at other things outside. He was far more interested in looking at the person holding the sparkler than looking at the sparkler itself. Then we lit a small fountain and once it started popping Samuel startled and immediately had a meltdown.  

We love our little firecracker! I didn't realize Samuel was high maintenance at first because he's the only baby I've ever had and I just assumed his temperament was normal. It wasn't until we started socializing him with babies his age that I started to notice a difference. At first I was just thinking "Man, their baby is so chill; he just falls asleep anywhere as soon as he gets tired." Then we hang out with another baby and I think, "Man, their baby is mellow; she is totally content just sitting there and staring off into space." Time after time it was the same story: Their baby is calm, their baby is calm, their baby is calm too. Eventually I had a "wait a minute..." moment and realized that it wasn't everyone else's babies that were mellow, it was Samuel that wasn't. He just is high maintenance--like me as my brother, Paul, jokes. 

Often if he's in a fussy mood people will try to offer advice on what's wrong although really they have no idea. It can be really frustrating because really people just don't understand. And how could they? If they have an easy baby--or easy children-- then it's hard to understand a baby that is in need of constant change and interaction, a baby that is fussy because he's tired but always battles hard going to sleep. A lot of the time he is quite happy and you can get him to smile and laugh at the drop of a hat. All babies get fussy sometimes, he just needs more catering than most. Really it just depends on the day. Or the hour ;)

We do have some friends whose daughter is just a few weeks older than Samuel and her temperament is very much like his. It is so nice to talk with them because they genuinely understand and that is such a great feeling!! I know I bring some of the work upon myself because of my choice in parenting style since I personally am not a cry-it-out mom. I'm fully aware, especially with Samuel's temperament, that it would make my life so much easier if I were a cry-it-out mom and would just stick my son in the back room and close the door while he cried and cried. But I'm not, especially when they're younger than a year.

There is a quote by Lyle J. Burrup that I often think of as my arms ache and I'm emotionally drained from soothing an unhappy baby for hours on end: "Anything of great worth often requires great sacrifice." And oh how he is worth it!!